Now I have somebody I love and trust abusing me," Merryn said. I sat next to a woman who I had just met moments earlier in the waiting room with my sister and mom. Jill Burke is a former writer and columnist for Alaska Dispatch News. All rights reserved. In 2013, Governor Quinn signed it into law requiring Illinois schools to teach it every single year. As I often tell people, our innocence was stolen, (our) trust taken, but the one thing we can reclaim as survivors is our voices. I left all the fragmented sentences, misspelled words, because I wanted readers to hear the voice of a young child.. See her personal website at ErinMerryn.net. Unfortunately, children who are abused once are at even higher risk of being abused again by someone else because they are vulnerable and easy to prey on. Here's how to protect your kids from online predators. But Ashley begged her not to say anything because Richard had told her they would "lose the house" if the girls told anyone. So, instead of speaking out, the only person she told her thoughts and feelings to was herself in the form of a little pink diary. A voice that flies across America and speaks at many of these CAC's that exist taking people back to my experience at the CAC and this time sharing all the details because I no longer carry the shame but instead a voice bringing awareness to these incredible centers that give children a new start on life and a path toward healing. When she is traveling to state capitols or speaking engagements she is entertaining her 270,000Instagram followers that follow her famous cat. (Read why most child abuse goes unreported). At age 11, Erin fell victim again. For so many years I stayed angry and bitter towards him. [3], She graduated from Schaumburg High School in 2004[4] and earned a Bachelor of Social Work from Western Illinois University in 2008. (2012) Fox News Self - Author of 'An Unimaginable Act'. The words of my cousin began haunting me. This law could have given me the ability to know I would be believed, that this is not a secret to keep, and how to report it. Get hyperlocal forecasts, radar and weather alerts. I always feared he would come back. It was a detailed account of how an officer came to her school to talk about stranger danger. She began to think about all the other prevention classes and drills she learned in school: how to say no to drugs, what to do in case of a fire, what to do in case of a tornado, how to never answer the door if parents arent home. How do you identify? Our guest speaker for the Luncheon will now be Erin Merryn, childhood sexual abuse survivor turned author, speaker, child advocate and activist, and the force behind Erin . Low near 30F. The man, then in his late 20s, abused her several more times in the next year, including, she says, raping her during a daytime visit when she thought he wouldn't be home. Erin, now a 33-year-old wife and mother of two with one on the way, has spent the last eight years travelling to every state advocating for abused children. She is the founder of Erin's Law, which requires public schools to teach children personal body safety on the prevention of child sexual abuse. One day, a particular entry she wrote caught her eye. She has appeared on Oprah, Today Show, Good Morning America, CNN, Fox, MSNBC, TLC documentary Breaking the Silence, CBS This Morning, Katie Couric, Tamaron Hall, 700 Club, and over 200 local media stations. 5 talking about this. Says Merryn: "[Ashley] made me pinky promise not to say anything. Alaska Dispatch: When you decided to confront and start corresponding with your cousin, how did it go at first? After reading that letter, a switch flipped inside Erin. Erin said the abuse stopped after her sister spoke up about her own abuse. CBS News' Reena Ninan visited a public school in Illinois to see how the school teaches kids about safe . However, she said theabuseand rape continueduntil she was almost nine. Read more about Erins Law at www.erinslaw.org, or about Erin herself at www.erinmerryn.net. Merryn: There is so much shame and stigma attached to sexual abuse. She came to me after I had been abused for two years and told me words I never expected to hear, that she too was being abused by the same family member. But when it came to being sexually abused, there was nothing. Erin Elizabeth was sexually abused from 11-13 by her older cousin. Every other headline horrifies the public with another predator taking not just advantage of a child but everything from a child. Under Erins Law, the New Jersey Commissioner of Education must provide school districts with age-appropriate sample learning activities and resources designed to implement this requirement. Stolen Innocencewas published soon after. Only this time, the person behind it was her older cousin, a nice young man with a bright future to whom she looked at as the brother she never had.. My mom was a mess, that day she probably cried for 10 straight hours, looking at my dad saying, we missed all the red flags, her grades, she was depressed, Erin recalled. We need to start teaching kids this, she said. Who were they? Erin's Law has passed in 21 states and is pending in 22 others. Partly cloudy. "He told me, just like in the past by this other perpetrator, 'Erin, this is our . COURIER/JOELLYN CURRY Every six minutes a child is sexually abused in the U.S. One in every 4 girls and 6 boys will be sexually assaulted before the turn 18 over 90% by a family member or friend. What if their family is pressuring them to just keep quiet and get on with their life? Senator Gillibrand on the federal version of Erin's Law to give federal funding to the law, and in December 2015 President Obama signed the federal version of Erin's Law under the Every Student Succeeds Act. Its somebody they know and trust.. I am so confident I will get this law passed in all 50 states, because God has already told me it will happen. Statistics show that one in four girls and one in six boys will be sexually abused by the age of 18. Erin decided at a young age to take a stand against evil and expose the silent epidemic of child sexual abuse in the spotlight. (Stacey Wescott / Chicago Tribune) During her quest,. In 2009 Texas passed a similar law but it was only a task force which did not mandate students be taught personal body safety, making Illinois the first state to require personal body safety education by law. It allowed me to let go of the bitterness, anger and rage I had toward him and find the freedom and peace I longed for and the ability to turn this painful event into something positive. In 1998 seventy five thousand six hundred and forty seven abused children were seen in one hundred and thirty nine Children's Advocacy Centers in America. Two against one, somebody had to believe us.. Erin wrote that letter. Merryn now. She wasn't always successful. My goal in life is to give a voice to the voiceless and put these predators out of business, she said. My question to hotel or motel management would be, Why not tell? Her name is Erin Merryn and she is the founder of Erins Law. She started by pulling out that little pink diary. ThediaryIkept my secrets locked away in, where I lost my innocence, I turned into a book mysenior year of high school called Stolen Innocence, because thats whathappened to me, Merryn said. Nightmares. In the wee hours of the night, Ashley's uncle "Richard" (not his real name), who lived in the house with his niece, appeared in the darkened room. Now, thanks to state Sen. Anthony R. Bucco, children of the Garden State may soon benefit from Merryns harrowing experience, knowledge and hope. My second abuser, my cousin, came from a family of all boys. She was also afraid she would lose her innocence. They dont warn us about our own family, they dont teach us that in school, her age 12 entry stated. This law requires personal body safety taught to children Pre-K to 12th grade through an age appropriate curriculum. So before CAC's a child brought to a police station could be filled with anxiety and fear that they are in trouble. He cornered her in basements, bathrooms and bedrooms, always reminding her that she shouldn't bother telling anyone because no one would believe her. As I describe in my books, that center was the foundation of my healing. A place I went to with my eleven year old sister and mother. The case never went to trial, and Brian received some counseling, but no punishment. Merryn is a national spokesperson for the National Children's Alliance, becoming the first survivor of child sexual abuse that went through a Children's Advocacy Center to speak on national television about her experience.[1]. She told them that, growing up in Illinois, she had experienced tornado drills, fire drills and bus drills; was taught about stranger danger and eight ways to say no to drugs through D.A.R.E., but no one ever taught her how to protect herself from sexual abuse and what to do if a family member or friend molested or raped her. In December 2010 I was voted News Maker of the year for the Daily Herald.She earned her masters degree in Social Work and is the author of Stolen Innocence, Living for Today, AnUnimaginableAct, Bailey No Ordinary Cat & The Diary of a Cat Named Carrot. Lawmakers are in the dark about this. Merryn travels the country advocating for children who are victims of sexual assault. The founder of Erin's Law. It is my hope hearing my message today youll see the importance of what Im here to talk to you about, said Erin Merryn. Her testimony was met with a standing ovation. This fundraiser is organized by Chicago Alliance Against Sexual Exploitation (Caase). There, at her friends house, in the middle of the night, she was sexually assaulted by her friends uncle. At age 17, she attempted suicide. This went on for a month before police got involved. He was the father of my best friend. Silence Broken and Stigmas Shattered -- Help for Incest Survivors Is Here Fans of Erin Merryn's heart-wrenching debut memoir Stolen Innocence were left wondering at the end what would become of an emotionally fragile Erin after her confrontation with the reality of being a child of incest and molestation. Eleven states have passed the legislation. But nobody asked those important questions. They never came, so I stayed silent. He sat down in front of Merryn and put his finger to his lips signaling her to remain quiet. I remember being so utterly confused.. Around the time we were getting ready to move away, my friend had a birthday party. In it, Erin chronicles how she cultivated the strength to face her abuser and eventually found relief from years of emotional restlessness, while also igniting the beginnings of a new fearless journey. One thing my abusers kept telling me was that I had no proof that they were hurting me, so why would anyone believe me? EN. She also pointed out the real loss of innocence for a child is when they are sexually abused and nothing is done about it. Erin also included the correspondence between her cousin and herself, for readers to also hear the perpetrator's side. No one would believe me, she recalls this man telling her. Hes grown into quite the little man and doesnt want me near the bathroom when he showers or gets dressed and I respect that. As a result, she has been interviewed by many major news organizations and TV programs beginning in 2006, on Good Morning America, Oprah, CNN, Today Show, Fox, Katie Couric, Nightline, TLC, OWN, MSNBC, People Magazine, Time Magazine, Glamour Magazine, USA Today, London Times, New York Times, Chicago Tribune, and dozens more local media. Erin Merryn A Voice for the Voiceless Author, Activist, Speaker, wife, mother, and force behind Erin's Law Glamour Magazine 2012 Woman of the Year. The book is titled "Stolen Innocence." Merryn was also the owner of the viral Instagram cat, Bailey, until he died in December 2018. "The new bill brings a mandate," Merryn said, "mandating that all (Illinois) schools--pre-school through 12th grade--must begin next fall teaching sexual-abuse prevention education in the schools." Do you believe one word is more appropriate than the other? "It's something that is going to be with me the rest of my life," Erin said. So far, her story has inspired many kids to speak up about abuse, and that has led to more predators put behind bars. Those were just the number of children who broke their silence that year. Do you know if it was as healing for him as it was for you? Alaska Dispatch: Do you think most lawmakers meaningfully comprehend the issue of sexual abuse? She is the author of Stolen Innocence, Living for . After it was republished by Health Communications in early 2005, she began traveling the nation telling her story about the sexual abuse she endured at hundreds of high schools, colleges, sexual assault centers, child abuse conferences and community events. Erins ongoing abuse with her friends uncle was over. Of course I was asked what I was referring to and I said my cousin Brian has been doing bad things. The abuse continued until she was almost 9. Behind those numbers are the faces of innocent children whose childhoods were shattered by actions of evil and sickness. Erin said all she ever learnedin school was aboutstranger danger. But knowing it was not strangers who abused her,she has made it her mission as an adult to make sure kids in K-12 schoolsacross the countryonce a year learnfroma school psychologist or social workerabout personal body safety education. Merryn: Many don't realize that there are 42 million survivors in America of child sexual abuse. Her dad had to sit down and have a tough conversation with his sister, and denial followed. Erin Merryn (born February 2, 1985) is the author of Stolen Innocence, Living for Today, and An Unimaginable Act. I eventually would return back to the room I was interviewed in nine months later when I began doing individual counseling but was still not ready to go there into details the shame overwhelmed me however I did learn to finally stop blaming myself for what happened to my younger sister and my entire family. I had only ever been told no one (would) believe me, I feared ruining our large extended family when they learned a family member (teenage cousin) was molesting my sister and I. Sixteen years ago, on March 29, 1998, my sister broke her silence to me. The path to justice for survivors of sexual assault is not an easy road. My sister and I were the only girls that he was around all the time. Do you still stay in contact with him? Sponsored by Rep. Geran Tarr, D-Anchorage, HB 233 puts Alaska among the states considering "Erin's Law" in 2014. The abuse went on for years. We live in a society that doesn't want to even address this issue. She was afraid she would be a burden to her cousin and that no one would believe her. 46 reviews. Get the best experience and stay connected to your community with our Spectrum News app. Merryn says a few months ago, a local . Merryn said the abuse only stopped because her family moved away. CAC The place Erin Merryn broke her silence The Children's Advocacy Center of Northwest Cook County Illinois In 1998 seventy five thousand six hundred and forty seven abused children were seen in one hundred and thirty nine Children's Advocacy Centers in America. From the time my son Jack was around 3, I began having the private parts talk with him. Forgiveness is what set me free. By speaking up even when family is against the idea, it is freedom for a survivor and allows them to reclaim a piece of their lives back. Is there anything about your life circumstances that you think made you a target? After an evening of playing with Ashley's dollhouse and watching The Little Mermaid, the girls went to bed in Ashley's room. Merryn is an author and activist against sexual abuse who founded "Erin's Law," which requires school to. My name is Erin Merryn and I am a survivor of child sexual abuse. It is when they hear my story of how I was raped, and how my abusers controlled the situation by being the only ones talking to me about what was happening, that they "get it." Did you have a helper or helpers in your life? Use safe and unsafe touch. The legislation, "Erin Merryn's Law," (S.6182 Klein/ A.8993 Dinowitz), would require schools to make a change to their . In Living for Today, readers find that Erin cultivated the strength to face her abuser . However, Merryn said this time the perpetrator was an older cousin, someone she had viewed as a brother figure. I got five sentences to my five pages, but he responded and it opened a door of communication, she said. House Bill 105 overwhelminglypassed the Ohio Housea year ago. Erins Law soon caught on nationwide. It was so brutal I thought I was dying, Merryn, Glamour magazines 2012 Woman of the Year, recalled in an interview with the Asbury Park Press. Erin has been traveling state to state testifying to lawmakers to pass Erin's law for 7 years. He continued to abuse her on and off for nearly two years, she says, often at holidays and celebrations with her close-knit extended family. Who encouraged you to keep talking, to keep fighting? Every parent should do their homework before they send their kids anywhere. Merryn successfully passed it in her state of Illinois in 2013 and has been traveling from one state capital to another testifying to state lawmakers to . Erin Merryn is a powerful speaker and advocate for countless, faceless children and adults in our country who have similarly suffered sexual abuse. Survivors need to know they have nothing to be ashamed of. 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